Friday Fragments// Jum'uah Jottings #6 - She's Always Buzzing Like Neon, Who Knows How Long She Can Go Before She Burns Out?

Doubt. Doubt's a word I've struggled with for a long time. "Raised" by two attorneys I quickly learned that in order to believe with certainty, one must begin with doubting. My problem however isn't doubting, my problem it forgetting not to blame. First I doubt my ability and then I blame myself for incapacity's. A man is not honest simply because he hasn't had the opportunity to steal, so am I really a better person today than I was yesterday simply because, it's no longer yesterday?

No. I want to change and am eager to grow but, I must keep in mind the power of limitations and boundaries. Change requires both now and then. Everything has it's maximum and much like my step-monsters credit limit, I'm about to max out. So before I hit that mark let us adapt my mothers wisdom "The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits." I know my limits, what are yours?


Friday Fragments//Jumuah Jottings #5

Today, I was walking out of a Starbucks and saw someone walking out behind me, thinking it would be the nice thing to do I held the door open. I was holding the door for about 30 seconds before realizing I was holding the door for my own shadow.

- FMyLife

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Anyone else heard of the Walk of Shame kit? First, let me explain that here (at the #6 party school) the walk of shame or walk a female takes after a one-night stand is quite popular. In fact, best friends and future in-laws are made it's so common, which is also quite sad. Anyways, some genius/creeper designed an entire kit to aid when the walk away from his place. When asked why he did it he said, "I'm just tired of chicks waking up and taking my shirts cause they lost theirs." --Now that ladies and gents is a true blue citizen. Get him an award!



Included:Dress - Flip flops - Backpack - Sunglasses - Pre-Pasted toothbrush-Wipes - Call/Don’t Call leave behind note card - Awareness bracelet
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Over Heard Moments in Ptexan's Life:

Girl on cell: Do you think it’s suspicious that I just bought five bottles of cranberry juice? People drink cranberry juice without vodka all the time…right?-- uh yeah in AA they do

Male coworker: My lips are still recovering from Vegas. --Glad I skipped Cabo

Guy #1: I know how to get your kid back, easy! I'll just put a bag of crack in your mom's car and call the cops and say "there is this old lady with a bag of crack and a baby in her car!" (laughs)
Girl: That would be so cool.

(Do we really wanna waste a bag of crack though?)

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This week in Science class I was teaching the Rugrats about conscious Vs. unconsciousness decisions the body makes.

I told them that your brain can have a conscious override over breathing. However, it is hard to stop breathing intentionally. Then a student in the back yelled "Oh, ya! That's why it's so hard to drown people!"

uh, what the ...what!?
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Lent's almost over and I finally get to eat Oreos. But, will I want them?

More than anything I just don't want to get invited to the Griffin's for the Egg-citing Egg-travaganza. The Griffins are our prude neighbors that are always elaborating on how I need to get married, and be a housewhore..err wife.

Do you know people who think they're above everyone else and have awful children?! I want to encage her middle son. I swear she must have dropped him as a baby. Any suggestions?

[Actual photo]

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The class took a field trip to the zoo this week. Question: Why did a parent offer to chaperon and drive with a license and vehicle that weren't his? Also, since when did the zoo become such a scandalous trip?

The sad part is I'm not even the one who realized what it resembles.He was 9.

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Word of the Week

FriendTM
function- Noun/Verb

When a friend low on cash (the paper kind) pays the group's bill on their debit card in order to get the cash from their friends--therefore avoiding both the ATM surcharge and the inconvenience of finding one.

Hey guys, can I FriendTM this? I don't have any cash.

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Remember when the 'ex-bestie' was discussing the value of v-day and relationships? Yeah, I found a gift he gave me almost 2 years ago for valentines day. I never opened it. I was too afraid I would love it. My mom says it's not the gift I'm afraid of loving. The gift and my heart remain unopened.



P.S. I think we should give 'him' a nickname. Any suggestions?
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For those of you who are fan's of my eldest brothers' increasing ignorance. Get aload of his AIM status. "K***** is Barack in '08. Broke in'09."
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The ex-fiance used to call me Bay. I hate pet names that make no sense. I tried explaining that a bay was a portion of water. He replied "Don't worry you're filled with liquid too"-- Word to the wise, if your potential partner gives you a crappy nickname/pet name it's not meant to be.

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Anyone else know about the wonders of K-Pop (Korean pop)? I didn't. I'm not hip with the kiddies these days. Apparently, behaving as though you from a culture that isn't yours/dancing/ singing in a different cultures' language is the new thing.

I had to let lil Susy know, I'm well aware of what a Cha Cha is--considering I'm HISPANIC- same for belly dancing. Then, I had to explain to Jane, in 6th grade, that she has NO clue what Super Junior is singing in their Korean song--except for the part where she was singing in English (lol).

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Useless information I learn as a Marriage and Family Relationship therapist

1.)In Hong Kong, a betrayed wife is legally allowed to kill her adulterous husband, but may only do so with her bare hands.

2.)85% of men who die of heart attacks during intercourse, are found to have been cheating on their wives.

3.)Women who read romance novels have sex twice as often as those who don’t.
-- uh Mrs.Cullens ;)

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Random Text of The Week//Where Do I Find these People?

"Hey PT-- if you stop by El Bistro can you grab my purse, I forgot it."

-- turns out my genuis of a friend was pissed at the waiter and so dined-and-dashed. Then she forgot her purse, with her wallet, and photo I.D.

:|

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Welp, I'm off to class, work, and home for Easter. Yes-- these will most assuredly result in lots of blogging tales. Best to everyone and have a productive/safe and blessed weekend!