4.09.2009

Friday Fragments// Jum'uah Jottings #6 - She's Always Buzzing Like Neon, Who Knows How Long She Can Go Before She Burns Out?

Doubt. Doubt's a word I've struggled with for a long time. "Raised" by two attorneys I quickly learned that in order to believe with certainty, one must begin with doubting. My problem however isn't doubting, my problem it forgetting not to blame. First I doubt my ability and then I blame myself for incapacity's. A man is not honest simply because he hasn't had the opportunity to steal, so am I really a better person today than I was yesterday simply because, it's no longer yesterday?

No. I want to change and am eager to grow but, I must keep in mind the power of limitations and boundaries. Change requires both now and then. Everything has it's maximum and much like my step-monsters credit limit, I'm about to max out. So before I hit that mark let us adapt my mothers wisdom "The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits." I know my limits, what are yours?


F
riday Fragments//Jumuah Jottings #5

Today, I was walking out of a Starbucks and saw someone walking out behind me, thinking it would be the nice thing to do I held the door open. I was holding the door for about 30 seconds before realizing I was holding the door for my own shadow.
- FMyLife

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Anyone else heard of the Walk of Shame kit? First, let me explain that here (at the #6 party school) the walk of shame or walk a female takes after a one-night stand is quite popular. In fact, best friends and future in-laws are made it's so common, which is also quite sad. Anyways, some genius/creeper designed an entire kit to aid when the walk away from his place. When asked why he did it he said, "I'm just tired of chicks waking up and taking my shirts cause they lost theirs." --Now that ladies and gents is a true blue citizen. Get him an award!



Included:Dress - Flip flops - Backpack - Sunglasses - Pre-Pasted toothbrush-Wipes - Call/Don’t Call leave behind note card - Awareness bracelet
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Over Heard Moments in Ptexan's Life:

Girl on cell: Do you think it’s suspicious that I just bought five bottles of cranberry juice? People drink cranberry juice without vodka all the time…right?-- uh yeah in AA they do

Male coworker: My lips are still recovering from Vegas. --Glad I skipped Cabo

Guy #1: I know how to get your kid back, easy! I'll just put a bag of crack in your mom's car and call the cops and say "there is this old lady with a bag of crack and a baby in her car!" (laughs)
Girl: That would be so cool.

(Do we really wanna waste a bag of crack though?)

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This week in Science class I was teaching the Rugrats about conscious Vs. unconsciousness decisions the body makes.

I told them that your brain can have a conscious override over breathing. However, it is hard to stop breathing intentionally. Then a student in the back yelled "Oh, ya! That's why it's so hard to drown people!"

uh, what the ...what!?
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Lent's almost over and I finally get to eat Oreos. But, will I want them?

More than anything I just don't want to get invited to the Griffin's for the Egg-citing Egg-travaganza. The Griffins are our prude neighbors that are always elaborating on how I need to get married, and be a housewhore..err wife.

Do you know people who think they're above everyone else and have awful children?! I want to encage her middle son. I swear she must have dropped him as a baby. Any suggestions?

[Actual photo]
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The class took a field trip to the zoo this week. Question: Why did a parent offer to chaperon and drive with a license and vehicle that weren't his? Also, since when did the zoo become such a scandalous trip?

Zootime09

The sad part is I'm not even the one who realized what it resembles.He was 9.

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Word of the Week


FriendTM
function- Noun/Verb

When a friend low on cash (the paper kind) pays the group's bill on their debit card in order to get the cash from their friends--therefore avoiding both the ATM surcharge and the inconvenience of finding one.

Hey guys, can I FriendTM this? I don't have any cash.

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Remember when the 'ex-bestie' was discussing the value of v-day and relationships? Yeah, I found a gift he gave me almost 2 years ago for valentines day. I never opened it. I was too afraid I would love it. My mom says it's not the gift I'm afraid of loving. The gift and my heart remain unopened.



P.S. I think we should give 'him' a nickname. Any suggestions?

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For those of you who are fan's of my eldest brothers' increasing ignorance. Get aload of his AIM status. "K***** is Barack in '08. Broke in'09."
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The ex-fiance used to call me Bay. I hate pet names that make no sense. I tried explaining that a bay was a portion of water. He replied "Don't worry you're filled with liquid too"-- Word to the wise, if your potential partner gives you a crappy nickname/pet name it's not meant to be.

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Anyone else know about the wonders of K-Pop (Korean pop)? I didn't. I'm not hip with the kiddies these days. Apparently, behaving as though you from a culture that isn't yours/dancing/ singing in a different cultures' language is the new thing.

I had to let lil Susy know, I'm well aware of what a Cha Cha is--considering I'm HISPANIC- same for belly dancing. Then, I had to explain to Jane, in 6th grade, that she has NO clue what Super Junior is singing in their Korean song--except for the part where she was singing in English (lol).

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Useless information I learn as a Marriage and Family Relationship therapist

1.)In Hong Kong, a betrayed wife is legally allowed to kill her adulterous husband, but may only do so with her bare hands.

2.)85% of men who die of heart attacks during intercourse, are found to have been cheating on their wives.

3.)Women who read romance novels have sex twice as often as those who don’t.
-- uh Mrs.Cullens ;)

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Random Text of The Week//Where Do I Find these People?

"Hey PT-- if you stop by El Bistro can you grab my purse, I forgot it."

-- turns out my genuis of a friend was pissed at the waiter and so dined-and-dashed. Then she forgot her purse, with her wallet, and photo I.D.

:|

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Welp, I'm off to class, work, and home for Easter. Yes-- these will most assuredly result in lots of blogging tales. Best to everyone and have a productive/safe and blessed weekend!






26 comments:

PerplxinTexan♥ said...

For more fun-time fragments don't forget to check out Half Past Kissin' Time


:)

Be Nice. My Cortisol Levels Are High.

MarjnHomer said...

lol. oh about the romance novels, I used to read them Before Marriage but don't anymore. so gotta disagree with that bcz marriage nothing was happening

Smoochiefrog said...

That walk of shame kit is just totally disgusting.

That random text is just hilarious though. :)

Mina said...

That kit thing is juz plan nasty lol where do people get these ideas from...and ewww that tree thingy lol i thought i was the only one who thought that *blushes*

The random text is jokes though lol...

Lisa said...

The #6 party school huh? So funny that they actually rank them. I mean I can understand Texas State being #1, and then mentioning #2. But, getting to #6? Sounds like some statisticians have too much time on their hands :)

I love how you added that Google thing for us about the walk of shame. Very nice touch!

Is that really the actual photo of the middle son of your neighbor? Laughing * I recommend bringing over a dog leash, some mace, perhaps a pit bull if you have one...

Perplxin, I so want you to do Friday fragments EVERYDAY! I really look forward to them. Love you lots, and funny as always.

PS-Major disagreement about the romance novels here.

Constructive Attitude said...

Yay for easter.

and i bet you anything the CREEPER that made the walk of shame kit, is none other than a MAN!

idiots.

Anonymous said...

with the boy you should beat him w/ a tick

Anonymous said...

stick*

Anonymous said...

ticks work too though

Mrs4444 said...

You sure are good at this fragment thing, PT.

It's so impressive to me that a little thing like quotation marks can say SO much; the quotes around "raised" by two attorneys is powerful. Sorry you had to use them.

Loved the info on women's rights in Japan. Kind of ironic, considering that being a woman in Japan pretty much sucks in a lot of ways.

That child looks evil. (And hungry.)

meno said...

*off to buy a romance novel...*

Anonymous said...

Does the romance novel thing work for us dudes?

PerplxinTexan♥ said...

@MarjNHomer-I think you disagree based on one person which is impossible--it's a comparison. It says that people who read (meaning currently) romance novels have twice as much sex. Perhaps if you still read them there would be a change in you sex life.

@SmoochieFrog- I see how quick you always are to be number 1, do you have automatic updates or what!? :) I'll have to stop by you site later today, hope you've got some great FF's going on

@Mina- I don't think it's disgusting. I think it's sad for females to put themselves in that situation but, at least the kit include general hygiene and clothing or else, like around her you see girls walking home in underwear

@Lisa- I don't UTA is number one anymore. They slipped down to about #4, which doesn't mean they're sobering up. It means they aren't drinking fast enough :P

I kid, I think a Colorado school is currently number 1, then one in like Iowa. Places in the middle of nowhere like to booze. Thanks for the compliment. Yes, I'm afraid those are my actual neighbors. You know when like people have HORRIBLE kids and are like "oh don't hit back , he's just playing with you" GRRRrr!

Did you say a pitbull? lmao!I can't Friday fragments everyday...it's not always friday :P

And about the romance novels read what I said to Mina. There are obviously exceptions to every case. You for example, are now Muslim obvious you're not the same kinda sex (if any) that you used to. You're also not exactly in the baby-making mood with the hubby lately. Perhaps you should read some of those to him...since he's not a 'reader' :)

Love ya much, ttyl.

Anonymous said...

Can't wait for the Easter Shinanigans, keep us posted. :)

Falling Up said...

I look forward to your Jumah Jottings every week :)

Can't believe they have a walk of shame kit.

That kids scares me.

Kids are exposed to everything these days. I'm ins shock he figured out what it resembled. I saw that pic on someone else's blog and didn't get it until later..lol.

Yaya said...

Haha! You were holding the door for your shadow! Something i would probably do!!

Aisha Aapi said...

I definitely agree with Falling Up! Kids these days know more than I do.

Thats really sad.

HOPELESSBELIEVER said...

LOL, I've got to start reading romance novels for sure! Who would ever have thought that was the answer??!!! I'm going to go out and buy one right now!! LOL
take care my friend,
Happy Easter,
Julian :)

z-dizzle said...

hmm i was gonna say that a nice nickname for "him" would be jason (from laguna beach) but thats weird no nvm....

i'm lovin the trip to the zoo, and how did you not realize what it was?! lol

as always that was pure genius PTexan ;)

Constructive Attitude said...

what happened to all of the "blogging tales", we're two days in spring break, and you havent updated.

tsk tsk missy.

and why didnt i get an "@"

Anonymous said...

Easter's over. Update.

Fix the layout too. Hurts My eyes.

DocElectron said...

Oh the Walk of Shame... also a very popular past time at my institution... That kit would have come in handy many a time - not for me though of course. ;)

PerplxinTexan♥ said...

@Ca- I told you that it was a man who designed it. He said he was tired of girls walking off with his clothes b/c they 'misplaced thiers.

@Ano- ummm...

@Ano (again)...figured

@Ano (again, again)- freagin' hilarious!

@MRs4444-I literally lol'd when I read that he looks hungry perhaps that's why he acts the way he does. Thanks for the compliment & the FFF award :)

@Meno- Be careful what you ask for ;)

@Ano- I would imagine so. Then again I'm not the census beureau

PerplxinTexan♥ said...

@ Ano #?- I'm trying to type/post as soon as possible. I'm just hella busy. Thansk for stopping by!

Falling up- Long time no talk stranger. Glad you stopped by and approve :) Are you following me too?

Yaya- You are amazing. 'nuff said. Perhaps some day we can hold each others shadows.

Aisha Api- WOAH! You guys are back? Please say yes. "Raghebs" writings are part of the reason I stuck around blogging. And now I embrace being a 'muslim blogger' :)

Hopeless Believer- Haha, cute. I don't think that's the ONLY answer ;) Thanks for stopping by again, reminds me to visit you, ya know :)

I think I just typed like 13 smilies. Hands tire. :(

Do 13 :) = 1 :( ?

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